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These Hands Exist July 4 2023 rei-edited 7/12/2023


there are more worlds than
I can hold within my hands
or within yours

why is it that then  
my hands my fingers
can be as sieves
and when I try to hold onto
all I would Love
it all slips
through

my hands are old
they hurt and ache
some days I cannot grab nor grip
onto anything
and it seems
onto anyone

how has this happened
my hands cannot listen
to the thoughts I'm sending them
please please I plead
don't let go
hold on

but now my hands shake
and quiver
when they might grasp
little gnarled joints
small worlds they once held and clung to
wmall hopeful dreams they reached for
small but real and oh so close to my heart

once
I told myself over and over
my wishing incantations
my brave encircling mantras
fingers please be tenacious
please help me grip, cling
and hold onto  anything, everyone
I have I had
for there was a time once
when I had and was nothing

so many worlds
within these whorls
and words I speak
the people
the memories I chose from
and embrace and seek

somewhere in my mind
my old hands
exist
and I call to them
come back and bring me back
to my old self.


^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^


I write this as I see little dreams
crumbling. There they go off on little paws.
Like lost pets and friends and loves

its a dealing with grief. that's why I write here
its hard when it feels as if its all evaporating

LEGAL COPYRIGHT FOR THIS POEM 10:53 PM PACIFIC STANDARD TIME
ON JULY 4 2023, INDEPENDENCE DAY
AND ALSO FOR THIS WRITER/AUTHOR/POET
MELISSA A. HOWELLS AND ALSO FOR THIS LEGALLY COPYRIGHTED AND
REGISTERED SITE TITLE MELOO STRAIGHT FROM HER TILT-A-WORLD.

re-edited for clarity and more precise emotional impact
7/12/2023 10:59PM PST time and date stamped/ all legal copyright@ retained
by MELISSA A. HOWELLS POET/AUTHOR WRITER.


                                  





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